A room for 8,000, please.

If you have a phobia of bugs, as my youngest son does, then I suggest you move onto the next blog in your blogroll today, because I am about to rant…about ants.  (I love rhyming words!!)  Unbeknownst to us, the little black ant population of the world decided to have their annual convention at our house this year.  We didn’t get the memo. 

We’ve been trying to explain, as civilly as possible, that the granddaddy long legs convention was held here last year, and the ladybug convention the year before that, and we are just too stretched to accommodate them right now.  But each time they vacate one room of the house, they simply take up residence in another.  They will go anywhere there is anything wet, sticky, or sugary.  Not being the queen of clean, that pretty much describes every crack and cranny around here.

I’m afraid civility isn’t working very well with these ants.  These are a tough bunch.  So far, they haven’t trashed any ant16 of our stuff, or stolen any towels, but we fear it may just be a matter of time.  They have definitely upset our   schedule, since it takes me fifteen extra minutes every meal time to scour down the kitchen countertop before I feel it is ant-free enough to cook on.  And R-T is on his belly on the kitchen floor as I write this trying to put chemical eviction notices in all the places the ants frequent.  He seems to run into ant troubles everywhere these days.

Last Saturday, H-T went to work with his dad.  He loves it when his dad lets him come to the Rescue Mission and help out for the day.  ESPECIALLY when his dad lets him hang out in the Security Room.  Because the Rescue Mission is located in a poverty-stricken area, it is not unusual to have criminal activity taking place just outside, so they were forced to install security cameras in various locations around the building.  The cameras are always recording, so that if something unfortunate happens, the Mission staff and police can rewind the footage and find out exactly what went down.  The security room is where the feed for the cameras goes, and you can watch all 14 cameras at once on the monitor.  H-T feels incredibly powerful sitting in that room keeping an eye on things and giving his dad a buzz on the beeper when he thinks he sees something worth sharing.

This past Saturday was an especially busy day at the Mission, and so H-T was thrilled to get to be stationed in the security room while his dad handled lots of odds and ends going on with the residents.  Unfortunately, H-T felt the need to buzz R-T quite often with news of unsavory characters loitering on camera four, or someone dumping out litter from their car on camera two.  R-T tried to be patient with all H-T’s interruptions on the buzzer, and kept his cool quite well until, at a particularly hectic moment, H-T buzzed in. 

“Dad, there’s an U-C-A on Camera Eight!”

R-T stopped what he was doing. “A  U-C-A ??  What’s that, son?”

“An Unidentified Crawling Ant moving across the camera!”

Needless to say, H-T lost his security room privileges for the rest of the day. Even his bug phobia wasn’t getting him off the hook this time.

Ok folks, I kid you not – – an ant just crawled across my keyboard!!!!!!!      You think it was searching for the Sticky Keys button??  I always knew that thing had to have SOME worthwhile purpose.

Stay tuned for updates on the Great Ant Convention of 08.  You ANT seen nothin’ yet!  (sorry, ant invasions make me corny)

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7 Responses

  1. You crack me up! I think that there must be a sub-convention at our house because the little goobers are not taking “no” for an answer when i tell them they’re not welcomed here.

    I’m glad I stopped by via Firefly Mom’s blog. 🙂

  2. Teresa – – a big welcome!! Thanks for stopping by! Can I tell my ants that there is free booze at the sub-convention?? I’ll do anything to get rid of these little boogers!!

  3. Thank you for blogging about the pesky little things – they have taken up residence here too…

    we have many sketches from previous years when we rented out our chalets involving ants… it was a war one – me and R against the ant population…all kinds of ammunition was used…until we were quite psychotic from our attempts…

    if you find a solution please share…:)

  4. Hi Topsy (and a little “Hi” to Teresa, too 😉

    We also are hosting a local chapter of these ants. Hubby seems less than concerned. I keep trying to tell him that he must view the ants as Napoleon’s forces. They may be led by a little guy, but if you don’t stop them fast they will soon have control of all Europe (or in this case, our house) plundering all the way.

  5. They are HORRIBLE this year. My Mom is having such a problem. I’ve heard that if you sprinkle baby powder or comet around doorways and windows, they won’t enter. They can’t walk through powdery stuff.

  6. Topsy – you’re too good. The time will come that I’ll brag that I knew you. Ants…I too have a story. Back in my peace corps days in west africa, i came home one day to a house (it was a cinder block home) that appeared to have cracks all over the floors and walls. Actually, the army ants had arrived. The standard local plan is to leave until they do but I had no local family so I fought them. First, put the bed legs in small cans of kerosene. Then mopped the floors with kerosene leaving a shine. Then mopped again. They were around for 3 days. Spooky. But when they left, my cockroach and other infestation problems were also solved. Weird to think that I went thru that and didn’t freak. I certainly would now.

  7. Ok everyone….I’m starting to see a pattern here…bloggers with ant troubles…think its a conspiracy?????

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